If You Need Help Navigating Your Sexual Identity See a Sex Therapist | Life Works Recovery
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If You Need Help Navigating Your Sexual Identity See a Sex Therapist

Sexual identity is defined as how you think of yourself and how you are attracted to others romantically. A person’s sexual identity is unique to them and does not have to fit in a predetermined category. Your upbringing, religion, family, culture and experience all shape your sexual identity. With so many variables, it is understandable why some people struggle with this part of their life. Seeking out a sex therapist is one of the best things you can do to navigate your sexual identity.

Issues with sexuality cause a ripple effect

Sexuality is a salient part of a person’s life. It affects their self-image, how they relate to others and their overall happiness and well-being. That said, any problems with sexuality can cause major problems in a person’s life. Signs of struggling with sexual identity might be manifested in:

  • Depression
  • Lack of meaningful relationships
  • Emotional outbursts or lack of normal emotion
  • Lack of connection with others
  • Low self-esteem
  • Self-destructive behavior

Sexual identity is one of the building blocks of a person’s psyche so if something is not right about that than other areas of their life will start to show it. You might be struggling with your sexual identity and not even know it.

A person who is internally struggling with their sexuality may dissociate, which means that they separate out the sexual feelings that they think are unacceptable from their conscious thoughts. As you can imagine, this leads to a rift in their person hood which they can’t reconcile for various reasons. A struggling person, for example, may already have a family and be known as heterosexual so awareness of their homosexuality would completely change their lives and their family. Even a single person may repress their sexuality if it goes against their religion or family expectations.

Many people struggle with their sexuality

Though the average age of making a decision about sexual identity is 12 years old, people of any age can question their sexual identity — it is not limited to just children and teenagers. Even if you are older and have had several homosexual or heterosexual relationships that do not mean that you have truly found your sexual identity.

There is an ever growing understanding of sexualities
In the United States there is an ever growing understanding of different types of sexualities. We don’t live in a world where the only choice is heterosexuality anymore. With a bloom of studies, there are many types of sexualities now recognized:

  • Pansexual (attracted to all people of varying sexualities)
  • Asexual (does not experience sexual attraction)
  • Graysexual (does not frequently experience sexual attraction)
  • Demisexual (only sexually attracted to who they have an emotional connection with)
  • Many more

But just because more types of sexuality are being defined doesn’t necessarily mean that they are accepted in every community. Some people are more accepting of different sexualities and others are not. This is why it is important to talk to a sex therapist who can help you plan how to share your sexuality with others in the best way possible. Of course, not everyone around you will approve of your sexuality but a therapist can help you deal with anxiety about coming out so you can have the best outcome possible.

Learning about your own sexuality will enrich your life

The saying “you can’t love others until you have learned to love yourself” is true about your sexuality. As you discover your sexual identity you will be able to relate to others better and more meaningfully. Many people have described a sense of “coming home” when they truly embrace their sexual identity. This peace and confidence with yourself will help you to live a fuller life.

Our sex therapists are ready and equipped to help

Sex therapy is a specific type of psychotherapy that addresses any sexual issues. A sex therapist is very different from a sex coach. Please use caution if you decide to seek out a sex coach as they are not required to have the training that sex therapists are. A sex therapist is fully qualified to address your issues with sexual identity. We can help you navigate these facets of your sexual identity:

  • Defining your sexual identity
  • How to “come out” to family and friends
  • Relating to family
  • Reconciling sexual identity with religion
  • How to handle workplace discrimination

Many of our clients have said that they were afraid to even talk about how they felt sexually. A lot of them had never spoken to anyone else about their attractions or sexual feelings until they came to our office. We want to assure you that you have nothing to be ashamed of when you talk to us. We have helped many people with all different types of sexuality and issues so you will not surprise or disappoint us. At Lifeworks Recovery we are not here to judge you but to help you discover yourself. Helping you live your best life is our calling.

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